Ride out your wipe out

Yesterday I bought a t-shirt that says “Ride out your wipe out.” It’s new-grass green, with a dainty pink flower alongside the sandblasted text. Quite innocent, actually. But I bought it with this season in mind. It’s been three weeks since the big event, and “real life” is setting in. The shock is wearing off, everyone important has been told, and I’m beginning to accept that this really did happen. The numbness is wearing off and I’m frustrated and angry that I have to change gears and figure out a new direction. This new freedom isn’t welcome.

One week and five days from today I’ll be on the Great Vacation of 2008, and I’m getting more and more eager for those many layovers and plane rides. Earlier this week I added another flight, so now we’re up to one train ride, seven flights, four layovers, ten visits to an airport, and maybe a bus ride. At first when I thought of all those hours “wasted” in airports and in the air/on the ground, I was a little disappointed.

Then I started to look forward to being forced to sit down and think. I even bought a journal yesterday for that very purpose, an artsy purple book with this in large freehand on the cover: “These are but Wild and Whirling Words.” I’m ready to buckle down and get my hands dirty with some nitty gritty soul searching. Airports can be pretty good places for that because nobody thinks twice if a girl is sitting alone with a journal and a bunch of kleenex. :) Don’t ask me how I know that.

So, I’m beginning to ride out my wipe out.

Yesterday I also bought a backpack and a bike helmet so I could really bike places instead of taking the car all the time. Today after a nap and lunch I biked down to the channel and read for an hour or so, then got a coffee toffee smoothie at Temptations (or Sweet Temptations? I can never keep them straight). I think it took 38 minutes on the way there, and a little less on the way home – not terrible, but there’s room for improvement. And I’m bushed!

When I got home I picked up the mail from yesterday and found a thick envelope from GVSU. I’ve been waiting for that one. And a thick envelope is better than a thin one, right, because if it was a rejection letter it would just be one sheet.

Still, you never know. And I wasn’t quite sure what I wanted that envelope to say. Both options would open and close doors for this fall, and both options could be a good thing, you know? I set the mail on the table and opened the other things first… VBS training – added that to the calendar, then added a few more things that came up recently. Then I put the junk mail in the shredding box. Then, I opened the cell phone bill and looked at the details, and put it with the other bills to be paid.

The GVSU envelope was just sitting there all by itself after that, so I had to open it. And it was… an acceptance letter! I was happy, and that was a good sign. And, my credits from MSU and Baker transferred pretty well. Everything from MSU transferred, and over half of my credits from Baker transferred. Looks like I’m a junior, finally!!!

That’s a good open door to pursue now. Lots of details left to be figured out, but I’ve got a little time yet. I’m glad the letter came before the vacation; now I can add it to the list of issues to sort out in the purple journal.

Part of this process includes getting input from close friends on the topic of what’s next for me, and if you’re a regular reader here, consider yourself a close friend. :) The doors are wide open – I don’t own a house, and I don’t have a rental contract. But I’m really happy to be close to family and my church, so I think for now I’m staying here. I guess the input I’m looking for would be along these lines:

• What are my top three strengths?
• In my work and free time, am I using my strengths well?
• What’s the most important thing to know when you enter a season of indefinite length?

If you feel like responding, you can leave a comment, send an email, call me, or meet me for coffee. My treat. :)

Until next time,
Jen